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Thirteen Inch Ruler (Feb, 1965)

ROTFL!!! I have never seen anything so funny in my life. I mean, it looks like a normal ruler right? But instead of 12 inches, it has 13!!! Hilarious!

And that “everyone can use an extra inch” line is just classic. I’m going to make that my new catch-phrase.

A GIFT THAT STAYS ON EVERYONE’S DESK!
EVERYONE WANTS THE RULER WITH THE BUILT-IN LAUGHS

DIFFERENT! UNUSUAL!
And it really has 13 inches. (Everyone can use an extra inch.)

Request FREE catalog
Worth a thousand wonderfuI laughs. Extra sturdy — with steel edge —smart silver and black design. A memorable business gift, premium or salesman “door opener.”

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WHY SCRATCH? (Nov, 1939)

WHY SCRATCH?
“Keep a Jar or Tube of Lucky Tiger Ointment Handy”
Made to allay Itching and Burning Feet—Crusty Scalps— Ringworm—Itchy Rectal Irritations — Insect Bites— Stings—Itchy Scalp—Externally caused Pimples—Soothe fire and sunburns.

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X-RAY SPECS (Feb, 1965)

X-RAY SPECS ONLY $1.00
An Hilarious Optical Illusion
Scientific optical principle really works. Imagine—you put on the “X-Ray” Specs and hold your hand in front of you. You seem to be able to look right through the flesh and see the bones underneath. Look at your friend. Is that really his body you “see” under his clothes? Loads of laughs and fun at parties. Send only $1 plus 25c shipping charges. Money Back Guarantee. HONOR HOUSE PRODUCTS CORP., Lynbrook, N.Y. Dept. 97XR02

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Wonder Warehouse 1962? (Nov, 1956)

NEW DEPARTURES OF TOMORROW
Wonder Warehouse 1962

Here’s tomorrow’s “look” in warehousing! Electronically, orders are received, checked against inventory, assembled, packed, wrapped, labeled, and whisked to shipping—untouched by human hands!

When this futuristic “stock-chaser” takes shape, its intricate moving parts will turn on New Departure ball bearings . . . preferred throughout industry for their accuracy, dependability, and service-free performance.

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Smoke In Bed? (Aug, 1946)

Smoke in bed? Could it really be possible? Have all my dreams come true? If I could find some of these I might just have to start smoking again.

Smoke In Bed?

DON’T—Unless you use the sensationally new 6 in 1 CIG-SMOKER. Designed scientifically for SAFE-CLEAN-FILTERED cigarette smoking. SEE the cig BURN inside this miracle. Durable silverglas creation. It combines a Holder-Filter-Fire Shield-Ash Guard-Smoke Cooler and Automatic Snuffer. PREVENTS- fires, burns, ash mess, accidents and irritating harmful smoking. It’s wind proof. Vew thrills in smoking-nothing else like it.

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Home on a Hemidemisemiquaver (Dec, 1942)

You know an ad is designed to appeal to geeks when it refers to a “fightin’ ham”. Not to mention people who know, or care, what a hemidemisemiquaver is.

Home on a Hemidemisemiquaver*

*Your quick interpretation —a 64th note, or for instance, a “dot” in Code ..

Wings shot-up… motor conking… radio half gone —yet a hemidemisemiquaver signal conies through to guide our fightin’ ham home.

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Typewriter with Changeable Typefaces (Apr, 1956)

one typewriter turns out both these specialized jobs…
IN ADDITION TO “EVERYDAY” TYPING!
REMINGTON RAND’S new Interchangeable Typewriter Type* makes it possible!

So easy to use. ..the typist makes the type change herself… at her desk …in seconds!

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The Math Pony (May, 1934)

The Math Pony
A Dictionary of Numbers

Multiplication reduced to Addition— Division to Subtraction.

Has multiplied for you all products from 1 to 10,000. More accurate than a slide rule—simpler than a “log” table—easier to use than either. Save mental effort, eliminate multiplication errors, and conserve time. Never can become obsolete. Pays for itself in a few hours of use.

90,000 products—212 pages—sewed binding—opens flat. HEAVY PAPER COVER $1.00. ART FABRIKOID COVER (semiflexible) $1.50
THE MATH PONY PUBLISHING CO. Box 1810-B. Milwaukee. Wis.

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Ad: “For A Smart Man I’m Pretty Dumb” (Mar, 1940)

“For A Smart Man I’m Pretty Dumb”

“I never realized this until too late—every fire insurance policy states that a complete list of destroyed and damaged property must be supplied before insurance can be paid. I had insurance, but the fire we had caught me way off base. It’s too late now to make a complete list for insurance settlement.

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DIVORCE EYE CRUTCHES! (Jul, 1936)

DIVORCE EYE CRUTCHES!
Get Rid of the Spectacle Handicap
The Natural Eyesight System tells how to do it at home. Full information FREE
NATURAL EYESIGHT INSTITUTE, Inc.
Dept. 67-H, Los Angeles, Calif.

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