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WHERE THE MAIL GOES, CREAM OF WHEAT GOES (Apr, 1918)

Yes, it’s true. Before becoming the spokesman for Big Tobacco, the Marlboro Man shilled for Big Oatmeal.

“WHERE THE MAIL GOES, CREAM OF WHEAT GOES.”

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SUPER JU JITSU (Jun, 1949)

SUPER JU JITSU
Now.. get tough double-quick!
Step up YOUR fighting: power, learn light-ning-quick American SUPER Ju Jitsu. Develop your body … be dangerous! Big illustrated home-study course, reveals secrets on how to make deadly weapons of just your bare hands. Easy to learn. Get these amazing lessons right away … you owe it to yourself. Complete price only $4.95, nothing more to pay! Mail coupon below with $4.95 and shipment will be made at once. Satisfaction guaranteed or refund.

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1977: Bally Home Library Computer – Early E-Commerce (Sep, 1977)

“This is the story of an incredible product. So incredible that we know of no future consumer product that will have such a far-reaching technological impact on society.”

This is a ridiculously over-hyped ad for the Bally Home Library Computer, a fairly interesting if somewhat unsucsessful game console/home computer system. The $10,000 IBM 5100 computer they are constantly comparing it to was actually a full-on portable workstation with a keyboard, CRT, and tape drive that was capable of emulating an IBM mainframe. I am sure, however, that the Bally had better games.

One really interesting thing is the mention of the DIAL-A-BARGAIN® ORDERING SYSTEM:
“Our technicians have programmed JS&A’s main computer so you can use the Bally to access our computer directly when Bally’s dual tape decks become available. With a special module and cassette, you will be able to 1) call our computer on our toll-free number, 2) place an order, and 3) find out when it will be shipped. Since you communicate directly with our computer, your order is processed immediately and can be shipped within a few hours after receipt.”

I don’t know if they ever actually deployed this system, but if they did it would be an impressively early and complete eCommerce system.

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Rub Listerine on Your Face After Shaving (Oct, 1927)

AFTER SHAVING
HERE IS A GOOD BET

Have you ever tried Listerine after shaving? You will like it.

We are so certain of this that we are willing to risk the cost of this page to tell you about it.

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Are You The Man? (Feb, 1948)

Are You The Man?

If you are dependable, honest and willing to work to own a large-profit, lifetime business and become financially independent, we invite you to mail the above coupon for full details. We are now enlarging this 17-year-old, nation-wide chain of individually-owned CERTIFIED Service businesses. We’ll establish you in YOUR OWN business and help finance you. You use successful methods of established Duraclean dealers. This is a sound, steady, lifetime business. Dealer gross profits (above materials and labor) are up to $20 for a day’s service on EACH of his service men. Easy to learn . . quickly established.

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Drive-in Market 1959? (May, 1956)

NEW DEPARTURES OF TOMORROW
Drive-in Market 1959?

A week’s shopping in minutes! And you haven’t moved from your car. It’s that simple at the Drive-In Market of tomorrow. Just select your Items from the monitor screen; electronic impulses select, assemble, deliver your order, total your bill and return your change.

It’s just a dream away! And when it takes shape, look for New Departure to provide the proper bearings to keep all moving parts functioning smoothly. New Departure ball bearings keep parts in perfect alignment, support loads from any angle and require little or no maintenance.

If you’re nursing a new idea involving moving parts, call on New Departure for top quality bearings and thorough engineering service.
NEW DEPARTURE • DIVISION OF GENERAL MOTORS • BRISTOL, CONNECTICUT
NEW DEPARTURE BALL BEARINGS
NOTHING ROLLS LIKE A BALL

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Ad: Erector Set (Dec, 1935)

SEE WHAT MIGHTY MECHANICAL MARVELS YOU CAN BUILD WITH THE GREAT NEW
ERECTOR

Hello Boys!
Look at that giant power plant! You build it yourself with the great new Erector. Piece by piece you erect its massive steel frame. Assemble its enormous fly whee1—pistons—governor. Mount its big, shining boilers. Then you hook up the powerful Erector electric engine and it throbs with action.

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Waste of Slaves (Nov, 1947)

Poor King Khufu. If only he had an internal combustion engine he wouldn’t have had to waste 300,000 perfectly good slaves building an eternal monument to diefy himself. He could have used engines AND the lives of 300,000 slaves to build a REALLY big pyramid.

KHUFU might have saved a LIFETIME

KING KHUFU had only slave-power with which to build the greatest of the pyramids. With engine-power, he might have saved a lifetime and the lives of
300,000 slaves.

Today, mightier and much more useful structures spring from dream to drawing board to reality in relatively short spans of time. Modern construction equip-ment powered by internal-combustion engines makes this possible. For today, the machine is the slave of man. Great dams, soaring bridges, towering buildings and broad highways are ours without backbreaking toil and wasted flesh and blood.

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An Inconvenient Ad (Nov, 1946)

It’s been quite a while since a company would use an image of factories spewing carbon dust into the atmosphere in a positive context for one of their ads.

Of course at the CEI they just call it life.

These furnaces are a long way from a tire maker’s plant, yet they are an important part of the rubber industry. They’re at Ville Platte, Louisiana, and they are making carbon black to add toughness and mileage to the nation’s truck and automobile tires.

But Ville Platte’s carbon black represents only a part of Cabot production. From the pine timber country of Florida, to the alfalfa fields of the Rio Grande valley and the natural gas fields of Texas, Oklahoma and West Virginia, Cabot Companies are at work providing essential raw materials for American industry.

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Calling all Men… STRIP-TEASE NECKTIE THAT GLOWS IN THE DARK (Feb, 1948)

Calling all Men…
STRIP-TEASE NECKTIE THAT GLOWS IN THE DARK

“SHE LOSES HER CLOTHES AS SHE GLOWS IN THE DARK”

Astounding: new STRIPTEASE NECKTIE Is the latest rage from coast to coast! Spectacular new novelty tie creation for men who demand the distinctive and unusual! Brings gasps of. sheer wonder. thrilling admiration the first time you wear it! By day, smart, handsome tie that is unrivalled for sheer beauty and extravagant good looks, by night a. glorious goddess of light revealed for all to see! She loses her clothes as she glows in the dark! A glorious, gleaming blonde beauty revealed in daring pose In the briefest of costumes, mysterious and magnificent! Write today and if you don’t agree this outstanding new necktie sensation is the mast exciting tie you’ve ever seen—it costs you absolutely nothing.

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