DIY Voodoo Kit (Sep, 1956)

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IF YOU know somebody who always beats you at croquet or who likes to swat you on the head and call you, “Old aardvark”—and who doesn’t know someone like that?— then what you need is a voodoo kit. With this you’ll spend many happy hours sticking needles into a little doll and pretending it’s your playmate. Voodoo is West Indian for black magic, which is the art of inflicting pain, sickness, death and bad luck by remote control. Another profitable trick you can do with it is cast love spells. You pick a real live doll to whom you aspire and, working through your voodoo doll, draw her to you as a magnet draws iron filings. You don’t need a toothless old practitioner any more; you buy this Do-It-Yourself Voodoo Kit, which is sold by a genius named Don Poynter of Cincinnati, Ohio. Don read a crack in a magazine about how there should be such a kit and promptly went to Haiti to arrange details. It sells well to people who say they want it for laughs.

  1. J. Bennett says: July 3, 20079:15 am

    The casual advocacy of the use of black magic shocks me. And does calling someone “old aardvark” (whatever that means) really justify the use of supernatural evil?

  2. Stannous says: July 3, 200711:07 am

    “Another Smash Hit from the creators of WHISKEY TOOTHPASTE.”

    J Bennett-
    There is nothing in this kit that has any chance of working Magick, black or any other color.
    It uses the sensationalized images of a few minor parts of Santerian Voudon to make a few bucks.
    For REAL power one must of course be blessed by the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
    *May He touch and protect us all with His Noodly Appendage*

  3. Charlie says: July 3, 200711:15 am

    What was it with the Whiskey? We had rye lipstick and now whiskey toothpaste. I think when they repealed prohibition some people got a little too excited.

  4. Blurgle says: July 3, 20072:11 pm

    Don Poynter went on to have a long and successful career in the field of novelty marketing. There was an article about him in the May, 2002 UC Magazine.

  5. […] Source&npsb;: Modern Mechanix. […]

  6. Blurgle says: July 4, 20078:45 pm

    Okay, this is a very weird coincidence.

    Don Poynter’s wife died on June 29. Her obituary ran in the Cincinnati papers the day you posted this.

  7. Waldo says: November 2, 200810:45 pm

    I want one

  8. Cza says: March 28, 20104:24 am

    I wonder how this works.

  9. Firebrand38 says: March 28, 20108:04 am

    Cza: You wonder how this works? There’s a sucker born every minute, that’s how.
    Look at J. Bennett taking this joke seriously.

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