“What! No Kitchen Telephone?” (Oct, 1955)

Well, I’m sure that is going to be a great marriage. What’s would the modern equivalent of this line be?

“What! No Kitchen Telephone?”

Of all things, Mr. Bridegroom! Surely you don’t expect that lovely new bride to get along without a telephone in the kitchen!

Maybe there was a time when one telephone seemed enough, just as one radio and one bathroom and one car seemed enough.

But everybody is used to more comfort and convenience these days. And there’s nothing that makes life so much easier as telephones around the home.

In the living room, of course. In the kitchen, conveniently hung on the wall. In the bedroom, to save steps and for added peace of mind both day and night. For the son and daughter who’d like telephones of their own, with separate listings.

Would you like to know more about complete telephone service and how surprisingly little it costs? Just call the business office of your local Bell telephone company.


Reminding you that someone, somewhere, would enjoy hearing your voice today.

  1. Hans says: August 17, 20118:37 am

    today: “What, no wide-screen TV in the bathroom and no Tablet PC integrated into the Refrigerator”?

  2. Don F says: August 17, 201111:44 am

    Heh — we didn’t have more than one car or bathroom or radio when I was growing up in the ’60s . . . or telephone either, until I hooked one up in my room when I was around 15. I salvaged parts from the trash cans behind a Bell Telephone warehouse that was down the street from us . . . .

  3. Mike says: August 17, 20114:57 pm

    Don F, Was that illegal to do back then?

  4. Don F says: August 17, 20117:28 pm

    Mike, it probably was. But I knew that another ringer would add another load to the line, making it detectible, so I disconnected the ringer on the phone in my room, so I had to listen for the phone downstairs ring if I wanted to answer an incoming call. I never got caught, in any case . . . .

  5. dorkly chair of the institute for space politics says: August 17, 20119:31 pm

    looks like synergy with “Once Upon A Honeymoon”

  6. M.S.W. says: August 18, 20116:45 am

    Modern equivalent of this line be= “What no Commercial Grade Stainless steel appliances that I’ll never use to their fullest capacity?”

  7. Hirudinea says: August 18, 20118:12 am

    “You don’t have the most recent consumer electronics so I won’t have sex with you.” Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose.

  8. Scott says: November 6, 20112:10 am

    Wow Don F, I did the same thing at about the same age, but around 1980. Found a rotary wall phone that someone threw out, mounted in my closet and hid it behind hanging clothes, ran a wire out my window on the second floor to the basement where the phone connection was, got to use it for a while, then my dad asked what the wire was for, I said it was an antenna wire for my stereo, he didn’t fall for that, traced it to the closet, he was so mad about and ripped the phone off the wall, I guess because it was illegal at the time to hook up your own phones.

  9. Don F says: November 6, 20115:02 am

    Scott, I guess you weren’t as sneaky as I was . . . (or maybe just a bad liar ;^)

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