Why Fat Women Are the Happiest (May, 1932)

Why Fat Women Are the Happiest

FAT women, especially those in middle age, are usually happier than thin women because they are better equipped to withstand the nervous strain brought on by the active pace now required of middle age women, according to Dr. McPhedran, of Toronto.

Women of 40 and 50 are expected to manage the household, take an active part in club and civic affairs, and still be fresh for parties in the evening.
All this is contrary to nature, and a reasonable degree of plumpness cushions the body against physical shocks and strain.

  1. Kenneth says: December 18, 20088:28 am

    Go on. I dare anyone to assert this is true to your mother, wife, sister, or significant other.

    If you do, just let us know where to scatter your ashes. 🙂

  2. Charlene says: December 18, 20084:55 pm

    Actually, I think it’s true. Once you hit forty you don’t give a damn about what people think of you.

    This paragraph would be more likely to anger the subsection of twenty-something guys (the “Nice Guys (TM)”) who think women can (and should) only be happy if they’re physically attractive. I think this is why they become so viciously and maliciously cruel and sarcastic to older, unattractive, or overweight women – they see women as things to use, and if the woman isn’t in a “usable” state she’s worthless. Somehow they never become anywhere near as vicious toward older, unattractive, or overweight men – but then again, men are people, right?

    It’s like the geniuses who think a woman who is physically attractive must have a greater sex drive than one who is not. Yeah, because ugly men are all eunuchs too.

  3. Rick Auricchio says: December 18, 20086:02 pm

    Too many mac-and-cheese pancakes!

  4. John M. Hanna says: December 18, 20086:36 pm

    Why do I get the feeling a man wrote this piece?

  5. Toronto says: December 18, 20087:01 pm

    Where are all these partying Toronto women?

  6. The Clashing Blade says: January 1, 200911:37 am

    So this is why my wife is an absolute comedian! Sorry,must go now,the mother-in-law is at the front door!How do I know its the mother-in-law? The mice are throwing themselves on the traps!

  7. Joe says: January 13, 200911:28 am

    Nah…some fat broad wrote this so she doesn’t feel bad about binging on double quarter pounders at McD’s….

  8. Anoia's Disciple says: January 21, 20096:22 pm

    You know what, Joe, you’re right! It’s only fat people eating quarter pounders; thin people never do. We’re thin. Here we are bashing ourselves for having that extra slice of toast and these fat broads don’t even feel bad about a meal at McD’s. (Life’s so unfair.)
    Care to know why they don’t? It’s because they’ve absolutely no reason to. Every person has the right to eat or not eat whatever and whenever they want. And that’s a good thing, too.
    After all, what would happen if I, for instance, were to suddenly decide that all men, whether actually interested in me or not, only exist for my visual pleasures and thus ought to stay below 160lb. (And fire and brimstone and a wooden spoon stuck in a drawer if they don’t! My wrath is terrible.) Gee, Joe, you might have to reconsider that slice of toast.
    Food is food, not a moral flaw – and those who prefer their fellow humans sane and happy will keep it that way.

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