You’ll Own “Slaves” by 1965 (Jan, 1957)

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You’ll Own “Slaves” by 1965

The robots are coming! When they do, you’ll command a host of push-button servants.

By O. O. Binder

IN 1863, Abe Lincoln freed the slaves. But by 1965, slavery will be back! We’ll all have personal slaves again, only this time we won’t fight a Civil War over them. Slavery will be here to stay.

Don’t be alarmed. We mean robot “slaves.” Let’s take a peek into the future to see what the Robot Age will bring. It is a morning of 1965. . .

You are gently awakened by soft chimes from your robot clock, which also turns up the heat, switches on radio news and signals your robot valet, whom you’ve affectionately named “Jingles.” He turns on your shower, dries you with a blast of warm air, and runs an electric shaver over your stubble. Jingles helps you dress, tying your necktie perfectly and parting your hair within a millimeter of where you like it, Down in the kitchen, Steela, the robot cook, opens a door in her own alloy body and withdraws eggs, toast and coffee from her built-in stove. Then she dumps the dishes back in and you hear her internal dishwasher bubbling as you leave for the garage.

In your robot car you simply set a dial for your destination and relax. Your automatic auto does the rest—following a radar beam downtown, passing other cars, slowing down in speed zones, gently applying radar brakes when necessary, even gassing up when your tank is empty. You give a friendly wave to robot traffic cops who break up all traffic jams with electronic speed and perception. Suddenly you hear gun shots. A thief is emptying his gun at a robot cop, who just keeps coming, bullets bouncing from his steel chest. The panicky thug races away in his car but the robot cop shifts himself into eighth gear and overtakes the bandit’s car on foot.

If you work at an office, your robot secretary takes dictation on voice tapes and types internally at the same time, handing you your letter as soon as you say “yours truly.” If you go golfing, the secretary answers the phone, records any messages, and also delivers any prerecorded message of yours.

At home, your robot reciter reads books to you from your microfilm library. His eye can see microscopic prints. Or you play chess with a robot companion, matching your wits against an electronic brain.

In 1956 research scientists already devised robot game players who always won against human opponents. Of « • course the 1965 robots can be adjusted as you wish by buttons for high, average or low skill.

When a heavy snow falls you don’t have to shovel the walk. Neither does your robot caretaker. He merely sprays cheap atomic heat around the grounds, melting the snow as fast as it falls. Yours is a robot home, too, turning all day on a foundation turntable to enjoy the utmost benefits of the sun.

At bedtime, you snap on the robot guard who detects any burglars electronically. It’s a cheaper version of the robot alarm system in 1956, guarding precious documents like the original Constitution, in the National Archives Building.

During the night, no mice or rats can escape the super-sensitive ears and infra-red eyes of your roving robot cat. Back in 1956 scientists experimented with the first robot animals, such as the robot mole that could follow light beams, the robot moth dancing around flames and robot mice finding their way out of mazes.

Fanciful, this picture of the near future ? A foretaste of such robot wonders surround us today, most of them arising in the short decade since World War II. Besides the well-known electronic brains and automation machinery, robot devices are multiplying with a fecundity the human race never achieved. Atomic plants have installed amazing robot hands and arms that look like the creations of a “mad scientist” to handle deadly fissionable products.

Most remarkable is General Electric‘s new Yes-Man, a master-slave manipulator of incredible dexterity. Any movement the human master makes with his hands—even lifting a finger—is faithfully duplicated by the powerful slave machine. In a fantastic demonstration, Yes-Man fixed a girl model’s hair-do and applied cosmetics, all with the gentle touch of a woman’s hand.

With suitable telephone and television circuits, master and slave can be thousands of miles apart. Thus a doctor in New York could perform an operation, via Yes-Man in Los Angeles!

But robots are becoming more versatile than being mere mechanical hands. The Hanford atomic plant now has a robot chemical analyzer which, like a dozen human chemists, extracts valuable traces of plutonium from nuclear wastes.

Medical science has devised a life-saving robot heart-lung-kidney machine which keeps weak patients alive through hitherto impossible operations and fatal illnesses.

Datamatic Corporation has released the robot reader which records data and pictures on magnetic tape at the super speed of 100 inches a second. At this tremendous rate, a who library can be recorded in a few hours.

In national defense, robot radar “peers” 1,800 miles beyond our borders to guard against sneak attack. If it comes, robot missiles like the Nike rocket would seek out enemy bombers unerringly, even in fog or darkness. Robot anti-aircraft guns spot the enemy plane, determine speed and height, swing and open fire in split seconds— all by themselves!

Robot drone planes serve for target practice. But on the drawing boards are pilotless robot fighter planes capable of supersonic jet maneuvers that would reduce human pilots to jelly.

The Army is now testing a robot scout plane whose TV-eye can scan enemy positions and transmit all it sees back to its base.

None of this amazes Dr. Norbert Wiener of MIT, the “Father of Cybernetics”—which is the academic term for all robot and automatic systems. It was two of his major mathematical concepts, some years ago, that led to the first electronic brains and all robot devices we know today.

Dr. Wiener himself enthusiastically prophesies a coming age of robot marvels undreamed of today. His far-reaching imagination foresees even robot psychiatrists, tabulating all the infinite fears and anxieties of the human patient, working out diagnosis and therapy in one short sitting.

In 1965 they may ask “Is there a robot doctor in the house?” Drug firms today ¦ * use robot brains to name new products and juggle formulas for new wonder drugs. Planned are robot medics to sort out data and find miracle cures long before human minds can see them. Robot surgeons will eventually perform delicate major operations with tremor-less hands of superhuman skill and speed.

The personal “slaves” mentioned before have been forecast by Dr. Alfred N. Goldsmith, consulting engineer. He pictures a long series of “Electrobots” as our mechanical menials.

The space satellites going up in 1957 will carry an ingenious robot reporter, or telemetering system transmitting all the “space scoops” that will thrill the world.

The first “man” to reach the moon may well be a space robot, immune to flying-saucer speeds and radiations from the atomic rockets, ignoring the bitter cold and airless space, and able to survive any crash landing.

Criminology is turning to robot detectives, pinning down obscure clues unfailingly. No criminal mastermind will escape such a mechanical mastermind equal to a dozen Sherlocks.

Perhaps most inspirational is the idea proposed by Professor Ralph Meagher of the University of Illinois. He visions the government using a robot economist, robot financier, robot statistician, etc., to help promote the welfare of 170 million Americans.

Swiftly tabulating all national data such as supply and demand, unemployment, inflation or deflation, and the stock market, this robot brain trust will find the solution to nation-wide problems swiftly, where human experts take too long.

Dr. Wiener, the Father of Robotry, may not live to see this grand outcome of his cybernetic brainchildren. But in his own words there is “no limit” to what the Robot Age can bring.

One jarring thought comes up.

At the recent National Electronics Conference in Chicago, Curtis R. Schafer, project engineer for the Norden-Ketay Corp. warned that tiny radios placed in the brain may some day make possible the control and enslavement of entire nations. Schafer said the control of man himself may be the ultimate achievement of what is known as “bio-control.”

But the good seems to outweigh evil in the case of the robots and someone will probably come up with a robot worrier to put our minds at ease.

One thing is certain—the robots are coming. The wonders of electronics will dominate every phase of our future life to make it more successful and pleasurable for everyone who lives on Earth.

17 comments
  1. Ben Blok says: April 11, 20083:33 am

    Did anyone really believe this in 1957 ? This seems propousterous, even today at over 40 years past the deadline.

  2. Chewxy says: April 11, 20084:01 am

    The wonders of electronics will dominate every phase of our future life to make it more successful and pleasurable for everyone who lives on Earth.

    Only true statement so far

  3. Lily says: April 11, 20086:24 am

    This is sooooooooo stupid. You wouldn’t have anything to do. You would get bored and very fat. You need something to do. Or you are going to get so bored and it will be like “What’ the point of living?”

  4. TomCC says: April 11, 20086:26 am

    A robot worrier? Should be simple enough… I think ThinkGeek could make tons off of the idea…

  5. jayessell says: April 11, 20088:19 am

    “Zombies of the Stratosphere”?
    Leonard Nimoy’s first film!

  6. Myles says: April 11, 20088:33 am

    When I saw 1965 as the prediction date, I guessed this was written 20 or 30 years earlier. Nope, 1957. All of the robots the authors referred to use “memorized” behavior or are directly controlled. The kind of robots he is predicting for the future require a form of artificial intelligence. This is twenty years before computers become mainstream. And come one, we all know the kind of robots he is talking about are going to be used for sex, not parting your hair. And how in 8 years would one afford all this new technology?

  7. Myles says: April 11, 200812:18 pm

    Looking at the picture, it looks like they are using a blast furnace or jet turbine for drying.

  8. Myles says: April 11, 200812:23 pm

    ” “Jingles.” He turns on your shower, dries you with a blast of warm air, and runs an electric shaver over your stubble…”

    This one gives me chills. I am going to let a robot shave me. I often give myself razor burn, and my feedback comes both from the pressure of the razor in my hand, and the feel of the razor on my face.

  9. Rick Auricchio says: April 11, 20089:13 pm

    “He merely sprays cheap atomic heat around the grounds, melting the snow as fast as it falls.”

    “At bedtime, you snap on the robot guard who detects any burglars electronically.”

    He merely sprays cheap atomic heat at the burglars, searing their skin and melting their shoes to the floor…

  10. Todd Lohenry says: April 12, 20085:14 am

    Funny that they thought people would still wear suits and ties in the future…

  11. Mark says: April 12, 20089:15 am

    Imagine a magazine trying to get away with an article like that today.

  12. Jilly says: April 12, 20083:13 pm

    Growing up in the Detroit-area, I was 11 when the first death via robot occurred

    http://en.wikipedia.org…

    that was big news.

    I wouldn’t let a robot shave me. :D

  13. Benzene says: April 13, 20089:29 pm

    I wouldn’t let something that looks like that dress me.

  14. David Byrden says: April 13, 200810:52 pm

    A lot of this has come true – the robot spacecraft, the robot statistician.
    The flaws in the predictions are intriguing:
    [1] the assumption that purely software functions had to be housed in humanoid robots.
    [2] the expectation, in 8 years, of consumer-priced machine vision systems (to let robots see their tasks, find their way around etc) when *no such systems existed*.

  15. Ralph Wilson says: April 15, 20086:59 am

    Computers are intended to replace people…..in order to increase profits….in order to make the shareholders happy. In the future, the man pictured on the first page of the article would not even have a job.

    Just wait until they make robots to replace millions of legal and illegal mexican workers in the USA………..

  16. David Byrden says: April 17, 20087:04 am

    Ralph;

    >> “Just wait until they make robots to replace millions of legal and illegal mexican workers in
    >> the USA”

    There are 2 reasons why this has not happened; [1] there are some tasks we don’t know how to do with robots; and [2] robots are, for many tasks, more expensive than people.

    There is no obvious way to significantly lower the cost of robots, therefore I think your prediction is wrong.

  17. MasteroftheUniverse says: November 26, 20085:52 pm

    WHO NEEDS ROBOTS WHEN YOU GOT HUMAN SLAVES THAT RUN ON McDONALDS AND GET PROGRAMMED BY SITCOMS?

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